Faith isn’t always found in loud prayers or songs of worship. Sometimes, it’s in the quiet moments when we have questions, doubts, and no clear answers—but we still choose to listen and trust. I remember experiencing this myself at times when I was younger. Thank you for sharing this Ms. Marga.
Thank you so much for sharing that! It’s comforting to know we're not alone in those quiet, uncertain seasons. There’s so much more strength in a faith that can sit with questions than one that pretends they aren't there. 🤍
What a beautiful piece! I completely felt what you wrote: “Physically present, but feeling a million miles away. I couldn’t understand why nothing stirred inside me...” There’s actually a scientific reason behind why people can “feel God” in church, and learning about it made a lot of things make sense to me. I find that God meets us quietly, outside of all the noise and expectations sometimes. Thank you for writing this ❤️ I really relate to a lot of what you share.
Thank you so much, Alana! That line came from such a lonely place, so it means the world to know it resonated with you. I love that thought about God meeting us quietly outside of all the expectations. That’s really where the most honest connection happens. Appreciate you sharing a piece of your heart here! 🩷
A lovely piece, Marga! I like the way you explore questioning not as an abandonment of faith, but as part of discovering what you genuinely believe. There is something very different about an inherited understanding and one we have allowed ourselves to examine and come to know for ourselves. Thank you for sharing this so openly. 🤍
Thanks for reading, Meg! That’s so true. It’s a scary journey ~ abandoning and questioning something you’ve known your whole life and starting over. But it’s such a necessary step! 🩶
What a resonant and beautiful piece Marga <3 I loved how well this essay flowed and how you blended poetry in without turning it into a poem haha :D
I'm glad you explored the other side to people becoming "disillusioned" with religion where they still have their beliefs but learn "why" they believe instead of rehearsing the script. You really captured this theme in this wonderful line here: "It means letting go of the automated answers, the fear-driven survival instincts, and the expectation that faith should always feel miraculous or safe."
As an atheist who struggled with believing as a child because of all the influences and especially my parents (which, coincidentally, I wrote abt recently), I understood this COMPLETELY! Drilling in the same songs, verses, and prayers eventually numbs their effect... They honestly became meaningless if there was no foundation for *why* they should even matter if you don't relate like others always seem to do!
I also really loved how you reframed "questioning" as just another way of understanding, since so much of that had been taken up by, again, those songs and prayers that got drilled into you! It's difficult work to face the fear of questioning and really ask what belief means to you
I wish you the best on the rest of your spiritual journey. Thank you for such a vulnerable piece :D
Wow, thank you so much for reading and for sharing that. It means a lot. You nailed it with the word "numb.” When something is repeated until it loses its pulse, it stops being a belief and just becomes background noise. It’s wild how universal that feeling is, even when people end up in totally different places like you and I did. Thanks for diving into this with me, Ethan! 🫶🏻
Oh Marga, thank you for sharing this! I have gone through something very very similar, and I resonated so much with this part: "From then on, I felt like everything I knew about Him and His word was just something I had been programmed to repeat. The answers were automatic. I realized my faith had never really been built on just love. It was built on a foundation of fear, with just a thin veneer of grace thrown over the top." So beautifully expressed. Have you read my post about my cozy origin? There are some similar themes... https://thecozypractice.substack.com/p/my-cozy-origin-story?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=9awy1
Oh, thank you. I'm sorry you've had to navigate that kind of unraveling too, but it really does help knowing we're not the only ones walking this road. I'll have to go take a look at your post! Thanks so much for reading and for sharing your heart here, Nikki! 🫶🏻
Having grown up in a religious town where I attended a christian school for a couple of years, I found this so refreshingly honest. Faith can't be enforced only inspired. The way you lean into the uncertainties and choose to ask the hard questions while still keeping your beliefs close to your heart is amazing. The moments of guidance or connection you felt are so sweet and touching. Especially when it comes to your relationship with your grandfather ❤️ Thank you for sharing such a personal and introspective piece!
Thank you so much, Alex! Growing up around that kind of environment definitely leaves an impression, so it means a lot to know this stuck with you. Leaning into the uncertainties is terrifying, but it's the only way to find something real. Thank you for reading so closely and for the sweet note about my grandfather! ❤️
Beautifully written Marga. I've had my 'searches' as well (relationship with God), and this piece of yours hits home. I love how you've opened the curtains of your mind and the experiences you went through leading to the discoveries you had and certainly will have. Thank you for sharing this with us <3
Faith isn’t always found in loud prayers or songs of worship. Sometimes, it’s in the quiet moments when we have questions, doubts, and no clear answers—but we still choose to listen and trust. I remember experiencing this myself at times when I was younger. Thank you for sharing this Ms. Marga.
Thank you so much for sharing that! It’s comforting to know we're not alone in those quiet, uncertain seasons. There’s so much more strength in a faith that can sit with questions than one that pretends they aren't there. 🤍
What a beautiful piece! I completely felt what you wrote: “Physically present, but feeling a million miles away. I couldn’t understand why nothing stirred inside me...” There’s actually a scientific reason behind why people can “feel God” in church, and learning about it made a lot of things make sense to me. I find that God meets us quietly, outside of all the noise and expectations sometimes. Thank you for writing this ❤️ I really relate to a lot of what you share.
Thank you so much, Alana! That line came from such a lonely place, so it means the world to know it resonated with you. I love that thought about God meeting us quietly outside of all the expectations. That’s really where the most honest connection happens. Appreciate you sharing a piece of your heart here! 🩷
A lovely piece, Marga! I like the way you explore questioning not as an abandonment of faith, but as part of discovering what you genuinely believe. There is something very different about an inherited understanding and one we have allowed ourselves to examine and come to know for ourselves. Thank you for sharing this so openly. 🤍
Thanks for reading, Meg! That’s so true. It’s a scary journey ~ abandoning and questioning something you’ve known your whole life and starting over. But it’s such a necessary step! 🩶
incredibly beautiful
Thank you so much, Pranshi! 🫶🏻
this is too good! I'm blown away by your writing!
Oh wow. Thank you for reading and for your kind words, Kaia! <3
What a resonant and beautiful piece Marga <3 I loved how well this essay flowed and how you blended poetry in without turning it into a poem haha :D
I'm glad you explored the other side to people becoming "disillusioned" with religion where they still have their beliefs but learn "why" they believe instead of rehearsing the script. You really captured this theme in this wonderful line here: "It means letting go of the automated answers, the fear-driven survival instincts, and the expectation that faith should always feel miraculous or safe."
As an atheist who struggled with believing as a child because of all the influences and especially my parents (which, coincidentally, I wrote abt recently), I understood this COMPLETELY! Drilling in the same songs, verses, and prayers eventually numbs their effect... They honestly became meaningless if there was no foundation for *why* they should even matter if you don't relate like others always seem to do!
I also really loved how you reframed "questioning" as just another way of understanding, since so much of that had been taken up by, again, those songs and prayers that got drilled into you! It's difficult work to face the fear of questioning and really ask what belief means to you
I wish you the best on the rest of your spiritual journey. Thank you for such a vulnerable piece :D
Wow, thank you so much for reading and for sharing that. It means a lot. You nailed it with the word "numb.” When something is repeated until it loses its pulse, it stops being a belief and just becomes background noise. It’s wild how universal that feeling is, even when people end up in totally different places like you and I did. Thanks for diving into this with me, Ethan! 🫶🏻
Yeah of course! Love great writing as always 😊✊
Oh Marga, thank you for sharing this! I have gone through something very very similar, and I resonated so much with this part: "From then on, I felt like everything I knew about Him and His word was just something I had been programmed to repeat. The answers were automatic. I realized my faith had never really been built on just love. It was built on a foundation of fear, with just a thin veneer of grace thrown over the top." So beautifully expressed. Have you read my post about my cozy origin? There are some similar themes... https://thecozypractice.substack.com/p/my-cozy-origin-story?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=9awy1
Oh, thank you. I'm sorry you've had to navigate that kind of unraveling too, but it really does help knowing we're not the only ones walking this road. I'll have to go take a look at your post! Thanks so much for reading and for sharing your heart here, Nikki! 🫶🏻
Having grown up in a religious town where I attended a christian school for a couple of years, I found this so refreshingly honest. Faith can't be enforced only inspired. The way you lean into the uncertainties and choose to ask the hard questions while still keeping your beliefs close to your heart is amazing. The moments of guidance or connection you felt are so sweet and touching. Especially when it comes to your relationship with your grandfather ❤️ Thank you for sharing such a personal and introspective piece!
Thank you so much, Alex! Growing up around that kind of environment definitely leaves an impression, so it means a lot to know this stuck with you. Leaning into the uncertainties is terrifying, but it's the only way to find something real. Thank you for reading so closely and for the sweet note about my grandfather! ❤️
Finding your faith is often a very personal journey and I felt you shared yours beautifully here. Thank you for the read ❤️
Beautifully written Marga. I've had my 'searches' as well (relationship with God), and this piece of yours hits home. I love how you've opened the curtains of your mind and the experiences you went through leading to the discoveries you had and certainly will have. Thank you for sharing this with us <3